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Saturday, January 1, 2011

Good Bye 2010, 2011, I Already Know What You Have In Store For Me...

I'm quite shocked at how fast the holidays came and went this year. Things always get frantic and crazy around Christmas, but I don't think I ever remember time flying by as it just did. I look back and 2010 was merely a blur. Lots of good times. Tons of changes. A lot of memories. I kind of hated to say good-bye to it. But... who gets anything out of staying in the past, right?... As I find myself reminising, however, my mind drifts off into thoughts of the future & all of the obstacles laying there and when I first found out the dates & the details, I was scared. But now that time is almost here, I'm worse off than ever.
I've been talking to other wives and/or reading their stories and I can't even begin to say the compasion, admiration, and respect I have for these women. It frustrates me to hear wives complain about how hard their life is -- raising children, working, etc... -- (mind you, I'm referring to couples, not those single ladies doing it all on their own.) when I hear about all of these others who give a completely different meaning to strong. But it makes me question myself -- can I do it? Can I make it through, keep my head up, and be an amazing support for my husband? I've been told that I'm tough, strong-willed, and determind. However, I am all of that when he is by my side... Taking him away is like taking my heart....
As much as I try not to be a downer, it is very difficult. Its hard to stay positive when you have a pretty good idea of what lies ahead. Especially, when there is nothing you can do to change it. I guess, all I can do is have faith... What is that quote? "God will never put more trials on you than you can bear..."